My dear Hela:
You can not imagine my happiness because of your writing. You are the only one who is able to understand Erna´s suffering. She is very alone, without anyone to speak a coherent word. She lives with Chasbel and his family, you can imagine her life. Now she hopes for the bitter to stop, otherwise it would be imposible to endure. Yes, my dear, there would be so much to talk about. Why don´t you write to me if you obtained the shoes and the dress. Write to me about Mordele´s gift. The postal service in Sackenhoym is good. All of the relatives are there. Except for Cyrel. The Gut parents are not there. How are you? How much I have missed you already. Regards I have already given to Maria. I do not have any more patience to write. I only ask you to mantain yourself well. You should not cry, you can rely on Erna on this. The sky, the moon and the stars are witnesses. Schmill Chasbel was with Erna and her daughter, he wanted them to go with him, but they did not want it so. He wanted to give them everything. I pity him. He is a noble man. Now be lovingly greeted and kissed. Live well, your Richt. Liebe Hela! You can not imagine my joy when reading your letter. You should know how much I miss you. My dear Hella write to me a lot. I will not write much to you. My dear father is in Sackenhoym. He is camp chief. Ber was just here. He greets you and wishes to see you soon. I greet you too, and send you a lot of kissses. Write everything to me. Deine (unreadeable name) Dearest Mother,
How are you? It feels like forever since I have seen you. I hope to see you again, and so does Miriam. I know that it is wishful to think you are still alive, but I can still believe it. As you can see, the Russians made it to Auschwitz. You should have seen the Nazis before they arrived; it was as if they were chickens without heads! They weren’t paying attention to us for the most part; it allowed me to escape for a few moments. I returned because I couldn’t leave Miriam alone, but what I saw outside shocked me. I went all the way to where there was a river, and on the other side there was a girl. I was so jealous of that girl, with her hair and her nice dresses. She was cleaner than I could remember being for years. She didn’t know how lucky she was. Miriam and I were left behind from the march. It was good that we hid, because they were probably going to another camp; the officers saving themselves. I wonder if the Russians found them too. When they came, we were all so excited. Miriam and I ran over to them, half in disbelief. They gave us food, chocolates even! When was the last time you can remember eating chocolate? It was like heaven. The best part, though, was not when the Russians actually got to the camp, but it was when somebody came running in to our barrack, shouting that we were free. And now Mama, we are free. Your daughters are free. Dearest Family,
You are extremely lucky to be living freely as citizens of the United States. I have been living in the ghetto, a sad place where I am punished for being who I am. And for being who I am, I have paid a terrible price. But I would not trade it for anything. However, I am content in thinking that someone will hear my story. I’m going to tell you stories of the ghettos in hope that some day my story will be heard. If you did not know, almost every city includes a ghetto. Another fact about the ghettos is that not only are there Jews, but there are gypsies and anyone else who is against the likes of Hitler. The ghettos are almost like another city filled with people whom Hitler thought are outcasts. I wonder every day when this war will end. It’s not right to judge, or discriminate people just because you can or because you want to. Do you know how many ghettos there are in the world? I know for sure that there are very many. There are big ones and small ones. The Lodz Ghetto seems to be quite scary. The Lodz ghetto held 160,000 Jews at one time. There was a man, named Chaim Rumkowski who was called the ‘Chairman of the Council’. He was to carry out the responsibilities of the people in the Ghetto. He made the Jews work until they could not move a single limb. It’s very sad here. No one has much hope. The SS police patrol the streets daily and nightly. I always feel trapped. But hopefully it will soon be over! On the flipside of things, I have met many new people and made some friends. Our neighbors, the Horton’s know someone who recently got deported to a concentration camp. It seems as if more and more people are leaving every day. I’m scared but I know we will get through this. I’ve met some gypsies that were some of the first to arrive here, at the ghetto, and they’ve told me many stories on how it has evolved. It’s very interesting. I’ve always wondered where people go once they get deported from the ghettos. They don’t let us read the newspapers here. After the deportations, the ghettos are always quieter or noisier. Some hide, so as not to be seen by the police and get deported, others go willingly thinking that their chance at survival is lost. I think that everyone has a chance if they are willing to fight for it. No one that I know has left yet. But it will probably be soon. Many of the gypsies have been deported- about 1,000 people. In all I am doing quite well. It’s a little overwhelming at times but I’m making it through. I hope you take this letter and keep it forever so that if I don’t make it, you’ll be able to tell my story. The ghettos are getting smaller. The number of ghettos is increasing. And people are leaving every day. I hope you take time to consider this as a tribute to all those who have left. May there be peace between these countries once more. Sincerely, Your loving daughter My Dear Parents!
If only the sky were paper and the world ink, I wouldn’t be capable of describing to you my suffering and all that I see around me. The camp is situated in a forest clearing. Already early in the morning they take us out to work in the forest. The soles of my feet are bleeding, because they took my shoes from me. We work all day, with hardly any food, and at night we sleep on the ground (they also took our coats from us). Every night drunken soldiers come and beat us with wooden sticks, and my body is already black from bloodstains under the skin and it looks like a piece of charred wood. Sometimes they toss us some uncooked carrots, or beets, and this is shameful and disgraceful: here fists fly in order to grab a little piece or a small leaf. The day before yesterday two boys escaped, so they lined us up in a row, and every fifth one in the line was shot to death. I was not the fifth but I know that I will not leave here alive. I part from you, dear Mother, dear Father, dear brothers, and I cry… |
“My dear,
With a painful heart, I sit to write a few words to you. Perhaps this is the last letter from me to you. I don’t know if you will ever receive this letter, but if you do receive it, at least you will know what happened to your close relatives and how they disappeared. I will start with our beloved parents of blessed memory. Our loving mother of blessed memory, thank God, died of natural causes in the year 1942. On the Jewish calendar, the date is 6 Tammuz. You should observe the yahrzeit of our mother’s death. Father was killed three months later by the murderers. I am sorry to say, that from the whole family, nobody survived. There is no sign of Zurek. We are the last. We are in danger. There is no possibility of our living through this. Andje, be strong and courageous. Take revenge, if you can. We don’t have a way out. We cannot run. We are surrounded on all sides. I will not write any more. I do not want to pain you. Volvche, his mother and Hela and her husband and child, thank God, are still here. If it will be possible to write, I will write to you further. Be well, Your sister, Nadka.” Many of these documents represent the last communications that victims made to their loved ones. In some cases, the desire to write was driven by something simple: that the authors might be remembered. On March 2, 1941, David Berger wrote from Vienna to Elsa Gross: “Be well, Elsa, and keep on going. I remember you. If something happens, I would want there to be somebody who would remember that someone named D. Berger had once lived. This will make things easier for me in the difficult moments.”
Awaiting her execution in prison, Gusta Berger-Ehrlich wrote to her daughters: “I force myself to eat so I won’t starve to death, because maybe some miracle will happen and I will get out of here alive. I have always believed in dreams and therefore maybe this time some miracle will happen to me also.”
In a letter to her sister written on December 6, 1944, Blanca Levi describes the conditions on a train heading to Bergen-Belsen:
“Dear Magda, I cannot describe in what emotional state I write this letter; for eight days we’ve been locked up in a railroad car. Out of 77 people—65 men and 12 women—14 have so far escaped, and I don’t know whether to do so myself. Imagine that at about 8-9 in the morning they release us from the railroad car to relieve ourselves—and this happens near the cars, because it’s impossible to move away even one step. Then they again lock us up and until the next morning they don’t open the railroad cars for us, no matter what happens. And, so, many of those here relieve themselves in the car. Once a day we get one slice of bread with a morsel of canned food, and this was only since Tuesday—until then we didn’t get a thing. The heart nearly passes out for a sip of water…. My Magdushka, It’s impossible to tolerate this much longer… to humiliate people to such an animal level. It is almost inconceivable. If I myself were not here, I wouldn’t be able to believe it…. I think that I will try to escape because if I fail and get caught—then at least death is certain…. I kiss you with love, Blanca Levi” In July of that year, Bala wrote from Birkenau. She used the name Halal, which is associated with the term slain in Hebrew, to encode the real meaning of her message: “Mrs. Halal [Slain] is very diligent here. Back home I didn’t like it when she would be in my house, but here I’m with her all the time, and I’ve already befriended her.” Bala’s stratagem is just one example of how many prisoners got their letters through Nazi censorship. Sarah Gerlitz, from Będzin, Poland, wanted to leave her daughter with a different message—one of pride. “Your mother walked with an upright posture, despite all of the humiliations that we suffered from our enemies, and if she is sentenced to die, she will die without condemning, without crying, but she will put a scornful smile on her face while facing her executioners,” she wrote. Unlike many of the writers cited here, Gerlitz survived. She and her husband were eventually reunited with their daughter and emigrated to Israel.
12 September 1940
…A lot has changed since we last saw each other. How long has it been? You must have heard from your parents that while they were preparing for emigration I tried very hard to get to South America. It seemed to be quite promising a year ago, but meanwhile everything has been shattered. I was at least lucky to have been employed for almost the entire time. In November 1938 the Berlin Community Bulletin, as well as all other Jewish papers, ceased to exist. But as early as January 1939 I got a position at the newly founded Juedisches Nachrichtenblatt (Jewish Information Bulletin). The work is much the same as before. We sit in the former offices of the Juedische Rundschau and the paper is being printed at the Aryanized printer of the Israelitisches Familienblatt …. There is little variety in our life. I go to the Kulturbund cinema once a week.… Every two months they produce a new play, everything of course with much more primitive means as even two years ago. Finally, I strangely still have a lot of friends. Strangely – since the majority of the sensible people have emigrated…. 5 August 1941
…Last Thursday between 9 p.m. and 11:30 p.m. house searches were conducted at the homes of over 1,000 Jewish families in Berlin. They searched for gold, money, tomatoes, fruit, red wine and everything else a Jew is not allowed to have nowadays. Whoever was not home was registered. Whoever was found in someone else's apartment was taken away on the spot. This, because Jews have to be in their own homes after 9 p.m. (but no one was informed of this before). They also took those people who are able to work but are not yet employed by the labour service. On the whole there were 70 arrests that evening. Now the riddle remains: May we go to the forests or not? Etc. As we found out, this is not a ridiculous question. You can see, we have great worries. Maybe soon the British air pirates will prove to us that there are much bigger worries… |
10 September 1941
…Unfortunately I had to postpone my vacation, and now traveling is out of the question. As of the 19 [of this month] we may not leave our residence without written authorization of the police. That means that we will not be able to go even to Potsdam or Bernau. As of the same date Jews will have to wear a Star of David, the size of the palm of a hand, well sewn to the clothes with the inscription " Jude" (Jew). Now I will be able to buy a newspaper only within the [permitted] hours 4 – 5 p.m.. I will not be able to eat in a restaurant or visit Aryan friends. And there are yet even more unpleasant results as you can well imagine…. 21 October 1941
…That evening…over 1,000 people were taken from their apartments. They had to quickly pack their suitcases and then they went to the assembly camp in the Levetzow street synagogue. Their apartments were sealed off – everything was confiscated. At Levetzow street they first took all the money from the people, then all metal belongings (including razors if they were metal), all documents with the exception of the identity card which was stamped "evacuated from Litzmannstadt" [should be "evacuated to Litzmannstadt" – Lodz in territory annexed to Germany from Poland]. No one had anticipated such swift action, and you can imagine the many tragedies: parents who could not say goodbye to their children, etc. No one except the community workers were permitted to enter the camp. Two days later, the train departed. All age groups, from 1 – 90, were represented, but the large majority were elderly people. It also happened that people were taken directly from the factories to their homes to pack their suitcases. No one knows at what pace it will continue. If only one train leaves every week, it will take over a year. It has gone that far that people now say: I hope we will manage to get to Litzmannstadt and not to Russia.'. You can see, we are becoming modest… [The German Jews deported to Lodz (Litzmannstadt in German) 30 November 1941
Up till now seven transports of around one thousand people have left Berlin: to Litzmannstadt, Minsk, Kovno, Riga. People who are above their mid sixties or who have children under the age of 1 are now normally not taken. One can take along baggage of 50 Kilo, one mattress, work tools and in some cases a sewing machine. Usually one gets notification several days in advance, but sometimes only one day ahead. Friends of mine were notified on a Tuesday evening to prepare for Wednesday. They managed to postpone it a bit. On Friday evening they got the same notification for Saturday. They waited and were not picked up. They are still here today. Apparently they were claimed by the armaments factory in which they work… The first transport left five weeks ago, and there is still no news what kind of life the people have. Some postcards were smuggled from Litzmannstadt. They all have the same content: "utter destitution, send money!". No one received confirmation that the money that was sent in fact arrived at its destination. A number of single men volunteered to go from Litzmannstadt to labour camps in Posen and Lissa. It seems that there, contrary to Litzmannstadt they don't suffer from hunger. No one knows how they really are, as their letters too are completely uninformative and are probably under censorship of the camp commanders. A short time ago we all had to declare within 48 hours if and what kind of typewriters, bikes, cameras, binoculars we possess…. We may only sell books with permission of the Reich Culture Chamber. We are not allowed to use public telephones any longer… [Between 8-28 November 1941 around 7,000 German and Austrian Jews were deported to Minsk. They were put in a special ghetto created for them. In order to create the space for them, over 6,000 local Jews from the Minsk ghetto were shot between 7-11 November. The fate of the Jews deported to Kovno and Riga at the end of November was different. The late November 1941 transports to Kovno were led from the trains to the execution site and were shot. The Jews deported to Riga were shot there on November 30.] 28 December 1941
We are still in our apartment. Miss Tuerk will probable go with the next transport. Aunt Nelly will have to move to a new residence for the second time.… The protection [from deportation] for [workers'] family members has been annulled.… If now parents and children are [on the list] and the children for example work for Siemens, the parents will have to go and the children stay behind. And they may not volunteer [for the deportation]. The age limit that existed for some time has been discontinued. Now the decisive factor is the fitness for transport [people who were too frail or too sick were exempted from deportation]… No one really knows what the political and military situation really is. 26 January 1942
Three transports have again left since the beginning of January. (All of them to Riga). This means that by now 10,000 people have gone from Berlin. There will be quiet in February, but in return it will probably go on with more strength in March. But then at least it will not be as cold as it is now. Recently, the evacuees – or as they are to be called from now on – the emigrants, under the age of 60 have to walk from the Levetzow street [assembly camp] to the Grunewald railway station. Can you imagine what that means in this cold weather? The people who left yesterday went in cattle cars. There were many old people among them, some taken from the old age home (up to 75 years old!) How many of these old people will not even survive the trip! And what happens after that – no one really knows. There has been no news from Litzmannstadt since the beginning of the new year. Mail sent there is rewith the notice that no mail is being delivered to that. The presumed reason is spotted typhus. So we don't know. Money sent is not being returned, but there is no confirmation that it reaches its destination. A transport left for Minsk on 12 November. They say that some people managed to smuggle letters home with the military mail. I have not seen such a letter. The same is being said about the people who left on 27 November and in January to Riga. I know a lady who actually read such a letter [from a person on these transports]. Not a single person of the 1.000 people who were on transport that went on 17 November to Kovno has written anything. This is how the widely spread rumor originated that all the people were shot on the way or murdered in some other way. All this of course does not reinforce the courage of the people affected by the evacuation. Thus the suicides have increased incredibly. By the way, Miss Tuerk and the Deutsches were on the last transport. The Deutsch family had everything ready for emigration when the war with the US broke out. They were totally unprepared for the possibility of an evacuation. The surprise was even worse than for others. Mrs. Deutsch was aware that her 73 year old husband would not survive it. Miss Tuerk was more composed, but of course, for her too, it was hard to leave. The Gestapo officials who appeared in our apartment were quite pleasant. They sealed only one cabinet, into which we had put Miss Tuerk's belongings. I accompanied Miss Tuerk to the police and then to the assembly point at Lewetzow street… There were many sad scenes of goodbyes there. 14 Days ago we all received a letter ordering us to submit all fur and wool articles… [For the transports in November see footnote for letter of 30 November 1941. The three transports in January 1942 leaving for Riga were brought into the ghetto created for the German Jews in Riga. Miss Tuerk and Mrs. Deutsch apparently went to Riga.] 9 July 1942
…Words cannot express. Of course you know about our fate, or rather you believe that you know it. But the truth is that people living far away cannot feel it in the same way as the people here, who are living through the end of Jewry in Germany. I was happy to learn from your letter what a full life you have over there. It would be nice if you could tell me about your work. I am still with the paper – "paper" is a somewhat exaggerated term to use for this bulletin…. It consists of two pages: 1¼ pages of text and ¾ of a page for ads – mostly death and rooms for rent. It is rather a miracle that I am still employed there, after all the cutbacks in recent years… Our circle of friends is constantly shrinking. People are parting all the time. Everyone says that they hope for a reunion, but at the same time they doubt it will occur. Sunday trips are long over. We visit each other and hold the same conversations we already had many times before. There is nothing to challenge the mind. It would be unjust to expect a person up to his neck in water to have spiritual interests. Of course, many books are still being read, but for many people this is a way to escape from reality. Work is a good diversion…. Aunt Nelly has also been working in a factory for the last months. She, who could not get out of bed in the mornings, now leaves home every morning at 6 a.m… [On 12 March 1943, Samter was deported from Berlin to Auschwitz. It was the 36th transport out of the 64 transports that left Berlin to the east and to the ghetto of Theresienstadt. A total of 50,535 Berlin Jews were deported with these transports between the fall of 1941 and the end of the war in 1945. There is no information about how or when Hermann Samter died in Auschwitz.] |
Today, October 3 [should read September] 1942, it is exactly two weeks since the horrible slaughter in Luck and its surroundings. For two gruesome weeks we - a few Jews who had succeeded in escaping from Luck at the very last moment - have been roaming about without sleeping at night, since death threatens us every moment. Out of the forest and back into the forest. We have become forest men. It happens that for two or even three days we are without a piece of bread, a drop of water. Our eyes are no longer able to shed tears. The heart burns with pain, there is a pressure so strong as to break it, and there is no help. We are all condemned to death. My dear son David - God knows if he is still alive - your mother was like a dove when they led her to the slaughter. I did not witness this with my own eyes; to my great pain and despair fate willed that I should abandon my dear wife and son and escape alone like a coward. However they are in a better position now than I am, they have already gone through what they had to, and every moment I expect to be caught. I am sitting in a dug-out in the forest where your grandfather used to live and I am writing both of you a farewell letter. Maybe fate will not be so cruel after all and, when the war is over, you will receive it by mail with the help of a goodhearted Gentile. Thus, I embrace both of you - you and your wife - and I send you my fatherly blessing before my death. Your unfortunate father H.P Letter no. 2 My dearest children, Jacob and Erna Another terrible four weeks have passed. Today it is exactly six weeks since the gruesome events in our town Luck and the surroundings. Since then thousands of Jews who had escaped were caught and shot dead. As for me, my bitter fate has preserved me for the time being, so that I may still suffer some time longer. As a matter of fact, mother and David are the luckiest of our whole family, they have already gone through what they had to, and they surely did not suffer such terrible moral pain as I do, having remained alive . These forty- two days have been awful. Only those who live are scared of death; for the dead it is a salvation. Thus, my children, imaging such a picture: I am sitting in a thick forest and fate willed that it should be exactly the same forest in which mother was born. An old, gray-haired man squatting on the earth; one would think that I was about seventy; my body is torn and bitten, and I have no shirt on, since I had to throw it away. I did not understand [until now] what a terrible plague the lice were with which Moses punished Pharaoh, as is written in the Pentateuch: "And the wise men could not stand before Pharaoh."* This means simply that the lice were eating them alive. Now I understand it, and it is an awful thing. How happy I would be if I could take a basin of hot water, do some washing, and put on a clean shirt and underwear; and then, may death arrive. That is that, my dear children. All is lost, but may I at least be the ransom for you, so that you, the survivors, the last spark left of our family, will not be extinguished. I am now in my misfortune, my comrade in distress was caught by the murderers on the second day of Rosh Hashanah, in full daylight; he had not been cautious enough. They tortured and then shot him. They search for me, too, they even trod on me in the stack of straw where I was hiding. Yet, for the time being, they have not succeeded. Since then I have been wandering alone at night from village to village, from tent to tent, from forest to forest. But the forest, unfortunately, has started balding, and I also am naked and barefoot, hungry and sleepy. I am walking like a sleepwalker without seeing my own shadow, I am wandering - where to, I myself do not know. Shall I succeed in staying alive? I am not at all sure. It is very improbable. One can still manage somehow, though . Goodbye . Your unfortunate father, Chaim Erratic |